Uppers and downers

I tweeted tonight that I was “Allowing myself to descend into a slough of despond as I know I will emerge all the quicker if I don’t fight it.”

This comes about every month or so and is a result of trying to be good for too long. Trying to be successful, trying to be healthy, trying to learn as much as I can, and trying to be liked by everyone. After a few weeks of this my bad fairy has had enough and starts saying “fuck it”.

Way back I used to handle this by going out on my fast motorbike and scaring myself and a few car drivers. Then for too many years I handled it by drinking myself to a standstill (which was a not inconsiderable feat).

Nowadays, having given up biking and drinking, all that is left to me is to eat crap and surf the web too much. Thankfully I am much more aware of the process and by not fighting it come out the other end quicker!

10 thoughts on “Uppers and downers”

  1. I get just the same feeling Euan! I end up eating myself to burst and stay up watching absolute drivel until I fall asleep without turning it off.

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  2. I have the same thing. Just last night as I was on my 3rd glass of rum, and eating an unnecessary sandwich, I was thinking I am heading to my dark place again. It should only be a day or two I hope, but in the past it used to be a week.

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  3. Heh, reassuring to know it's not just me. 🙂 I'd definitely agree; the more I just accept occasional down times, acknowledge them as a normal & healthy part of being a human being, then the faster I get through them and the quicker the return to positivity, in my experience. Although I must confess I do still resort to alcohol at times!

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  4. If you think that these blips in your life are a mental health issue then why not come and join us on The Elephant in the Room on Facebook. It's a wonderful place set up by Mind, the mental health charity, to help us understand why no-one talks about the very large elephant that sits in most workplaces and is completely ignored by everyone except the people with mental health issues.Peer support at its very best.

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  5. Lovely honest and brave post Euan. I guess it's beginning to dawn on many of us that our connectedness means we get to deal with being authentic and real too…that humanness isn't a one-way route to success all the time, any more than a company can turn in a year on year growth in ROI without bubbles bursting… natural contractions are a part of who we are.

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