Uppers and downers

I tweeted tonight that I was “Allowing myself to descend into a slough of despond as I know I will emerge all the quicker if I don’t fight it.”

This comes about every month or so and is a result of trying to be good for too long. Trying to be successful, trying to be healthy, trying to learn as much as I can, and trying to be liked by everyone. After a few weeks of this my bad fairy has had enough and starts saying “fuck it”.

Way back I used to handle this by going out on my fast motorbike and scaring myself and a few car drivers. Then for too many years I handled it by drinking myself to a standstill (which was a not inconsiderable feat).

Nowadays, having given up biking and drinking, all that is left to me is to eat crap and surf the web too much. Thankfully I am much more aware of the process and by not fighting it come out the other end quicker!

10 thoughts on “Uppers and downers

  1. I get just the same feeling Euan! I end up eating myself to burst and stay up watching absolute drivel until I fall asleep without turning it off.


  2. I have the same thing. Just last night as I was on my 3rd glass of rum, and eating an unnecessary sandwich, I was thinking I am heading to my dark place again. It should only be a day or two I hope, but in the past it used to be a week.


  3. Heh, reassuring to know it's not just me. 🙂 I'd definitely agree; the more I just accept occasional down times, acknowledge them as a normal & healthy part of being a human being, then the faster I get through them and the quicker the return to positivity, in my experience. Although I must confess I do still resort to alcohol at times!


  4. If you think that these blips in your life are a mental health issue then why not come and join us on The Elephant in the Room on Facebook. It's a wonderful place set up by Mind, the mental health charity, to help us understand why no-one talks about the very large elephant that sits in most workplaces and is completely ignored by everyone except the people with mental health issues.Peer support at its very best.


  5. Lovely honest and brave post Euan. I guess it's beginning to dawn on many of us that our connectedness means we get to deal with being authentic and real too…that humanness isn't a one-way route to success all the time, any more than a company can turn in a year on year growth in ROI without bubbles bursting… natural contractions are a part of who we are.


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